Adoption

We have officially adopted our daughter. We went to court, got sworn in, and our lawyer called people to the stand, including Dave, Sue, & Sue’s CPS worker. They all were asked if they thought the adoption was a good idea (and thankfully they all said Yes). We technically are supposed to foster Sue for 6 months before we should be allowed to adopt her. We were one week shy of that 6 month date so Sue’s lawyer had to request a waiver – which the judge jokingly denied – which Dave didn’t find very funny – which made the judge suddenly worried about Dave.  The judge tried to explain that he was only kidding and the day was a happy day and that he likes to joke around.  It was a very emotional, happy, and huge moment in our lives…not really the time for corny jokes.

Sue’s brother was adopted by his foster family at the same time.  We got to see him happily be accepted into his new family.  Overall, it was an amazing day.

None of us really ‘feel’ any differently now.  We still had to get up and go to work/school the next day. We still have bedtime, homework, chores…I will say that there is less worry and stress.  We don’t have to fill out paperwork for every single thing that happens. And we don’t have to worry about CPS taking Sue away from us. Now we can just be a normal family.

As I said in the last post, our adoption agency is closing their office in our city. We were told on Thursday that we had to find a new agency by Friday.  They really aren’t handling this transition very well. I emailed the lady and told her there was NO WAY we were choosing an agency by the next day and wanted to know the consequences. She strongly encouraged us to choose and do a release.  I strongly told her that wasn’t going to happen.  We talked to John (our case manager/trainer from Arrow) and he has accepted a position with Bair. We interviewed the case manager at another agency called Pathways. We talked to a few of the foster families we know at Arrow.  After all of that, we’ve decided to go with Bair. We plan on just getting transferred over and keeping our license updated. We will be on hold for a while, as we get settled with our new little family. Then, sometime in the future, we will open back up and look to bring another child into the family.  We’ve gone from a table for two to a table for three very quickly.  When will it be a table for four?  Only time will tell.

Negotiating

We are getting down to the final days until adoption. One of the last things we had to do was negotiate subsidies. In Texas, the ‘negotiation’ is that the kid is entitled to full benefits…so there was no negotiation. They told us why she’s entitled to subsidies, how much she gets, that she’s eligible for Medicaid and state schooling tuition reimbursement. Special needs kids being adopted are eligible for the subsidies and Medicaid until they turn 18. In our case, since we are adopting after she turned 16, she is eligible until she turns 21. The state schooling reimbursement is something she can use for life, as long as the state leaves the foster kid tuition reimbursement Senate bill alone. She can get as much education as she wants, she can become a doctor for example, and the state pays the way as long as she is going to a state school. She can start college right after high school, or she can work and go to college when she is 30…still covered as long as the Senate bill is still in effect.

In shocking news, Arrow’s San Antonio office has decided to close. We found out, along with the staff apparently, at an emergency meeting called by Arrow.  Arrow is headquartered in Houston, TX and has branches in several cities across Texas and some in other states. The San Antonio office is apparently not making money. Arrow partnered with another faith-bases agency, called Bair.  Bair’s Houston branch isn’t making any money. So Arrow is taking over the Bair office in Houston, and Bair is taking over the Arrow office in San Antonio.  What that means for us…we just lost our adoption agency. They are seeing us through the adoption this week, but then we have to find another agency. We can transition to Bair if we want to, but we haven’t decided on that yet. We don’t know anything about them. There is another agency in town, Pathways, that we are going to check out too. We may have to redo all our training, get all the inspections done again, and do all the steps we did with Arrow to get licensed with the new agency.

All that being said, when I found out they were closing, my first concern was what was going to happen to John, the Arrow employee that trained us and has been so wonderful through our entire process. What was going to happen to Christy, who is our case manager.  They found out they were losing their jobs when we found out the office was closing. John may have the option to get hired at Bair.  Christy is going to see her 8 adoptions through this month then decide what’s best for her family.  They both are in this profession to help these needy kids.  Finding out, at Christmas, that you are losing your job is hard but they both are so much more concerned with the kids they have been working with. Please say a prayer that all the employees of the office find jobs quickly.

Sick Parent

My allergies act up every year during this pollen season and it always turns into a cold.  So right now I’m sick.  And right now I’m trying really hard not to spread this sickness to my daughter.  It’s been really hard not to hug her for the last 2 days.  How do you do it parents?  How do you get through an illness without passing it along to your kids but still show them all the love and attention they need?  I know I haven’t figured it out yet.

Our Christmas tree and outside decorations are up.  We put up more than usual outside because we let Sue pick out some things.  We put up too much apparently because we blew a circuit.  We can’t figure out if it’s the extension cord, or if the lights are bad, or if there is just too much going into the power outlet.  We are going to troubleshoot it all until we get everything lit back up.  Right now just one half of the yard is on…which looks silly but when the entire yard is back up, it’ll look awesome.

We are at a countdown to adoption day.  It’s less than 2 weeks away.  We still haven’t heard from subsidies, but I contacted our lawyer, Sue’s lawyer, our adoption agency, and CPS and they all say we are good to go.  Let’s just hope none of us are sick…stupid allergies!